Monday, November 17, 2008

Free To Be Me

Can I just say it? So far at least (and it is more than half over) November 2008 has sucked. My grandfather passed away, we had a bad leak into our bedroom, then we found out Neal may have to have knee surgery, then all of Southern California caught fire, my parents home in peril for a time, and tonight someone ran into Neal's truck and just drove away. He discovered the damage after his softball game, having no clue who could have hit him. Obviously some of the events of the month are on a whole other plane than others, but the little seem somehow compounded by the big.

Before the fires and the car damages I sent out a prayer request to friends, and I stated quite plainly at the beginning that there was "whining ahead." It just feels like we have been on a short end of an unfriendly stick for a while now, particularly when it comes to medical issues and bills, like Neal's "simple outpatient procedure" turning into a $17,000 4 day stay in the hospital. You sort of feel like you can't catch a break some days... weeks... years.

Anyway, someone who had my whiny prayer request forwarded to them sent me the nicest note in response. It really made my day and touched my heart. He complimented me for being "real." He encouraged me to be transparent. I'm not looking for more, but it was just so refreshing. I am transparent, to a fault sometimes. (A lot of times.) I have had people treat me like I lacked faith, or I was setting a bad example, but I can't bring myself to play the game. Sometimes this Walk of Faith is just hard.

I was thinking about that tonight and I remembered an old movie they used to shown in school back in the 70's called "Free to Be You and Me." It predates some of the diversity that is trying to be enforced now, it was an innocent time, talking about people being OK to feel their feelings and such. Anyway, I went looking for it on You Tube today and found a post that well expressed how I'm feeling these days. I'm not really a cryer, but maybe it's alright to whine... a little... too.

By the way, just for those who maybe want to reprimand me a little for the whining... Neal and I took a trip alone to the grocery store tonight talking about the "stuff" we've been dealing with and we know, this isn't our home, it's not supposed to be a peaceful place.

1 comment:

Susan said...

I love you Diana! You are simply the best! Want to come over and whine and cheese with us.....or how about just come over and we'll play silly games and laugh ourselves till we can't handle it anymore!