I often tell my children, "Anything worth having is working for." It's a lesson I suspect I am going to find working itself out in my own life in regards to this endeavor of 30 days of praise.
Last night's epiphany about serving didn't magically transform things in my day today. I have found myself to be growing more and more weary as the summer has progressed. With my children out of school I have had to keep very odd hours. Some days I work very early in the morning before they even get out of bed. Other mornings I have to get them up and off to assorted activities and commitments. I find myself in the car driving them about A LOT. I'm a little worn out.
Today I was thinking about the 30 Days of Praise. I was frustrated because in my busyness I don't feel like I am accomplishing what I set out to. I was talking to the Lord (I call it talking and not praying because it had no sense of formality or of actually being engaged with Him) and sort half whining, half asking, "Why can't I better focus and worship you?"
Into my mind came thoughts of the following scripture passage:
Immediately Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He sent the multitudes away. And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. Now when evening came, He was alone there. Matthew 14:22-23
Jesus went by Himself, he was alone.
That's a rare commodity in this busy world, alone time with God. But for the Lord, it was a priority. It's how He stay connected with the Father, by going off by Himself to pray.
I went to the Christian bookstore today and sought out something to help me focus and worship Him more. I found a book by Linda Dillow entitled "Satisfy My Thirsty Soul," and its companion journal "My Worship Journey." There is a 12 week bible study included in the books. Apparently my 30 days are now snow-balling.
I didn't get a chance to start it tonight, I only gave it a short peruse. But I am going to start it over the next day or so. I want to learn to worship the Lord more, better, consistently. And as someone once said, "anything worth having is worth working for."
I want intimacy with the Lord. I am willing to work to find it, or create it, whichever the case may be. As I perused the book tonight I did come across one interesting analogy the author had for intimacy. She defined it as "into me, see." That is my desire, to look into the heart of the Lord, and know He is looking into mine.
So today I want to praise God for the tools and opportunities He makes available to help us grow in Him, and know Him more.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
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