Friday, December 7, 2012

A New Low

I am sharing a post from my ewight loss blog, "The Fight to Lose" because today's entry is just as much about my spiritual walk as it is my physical one, if not more so. And I think it's worth sharing, giving God the glory in my successes is key to remembering Who is Lord over my life, because I have learned very well, it isn't me! 

From The Fight to Lose:

Today is day 172 of my lifestyle change/ weight loss efforts. It's a big day for me because I actually find myself LOWER on the scale than I did when I lost so much weight two years ago. I think it's likely that this is the lowest I have been since before my baby girl was born at the end of 2001. I can't say that without absolute certainty because I wasn't one to weight myself for a lot of years because the numbers were so disheartening, but I do know it's the lowest I have been since my 40th birthday.


It's exciting for me because I have so much more balance in my weight loss this time. Taking care of my body has its proper place in my life. When I lost the weight at 40, I honestly think I was teetering on the edge of a midlife crisis. There was an obsessiveness to the process and it wasn't completely for the right reasons, I was very hung up on how I looked, and who might be looking at me than I was about my overall health and well-being and feeling good. This time the looking good (or better) is just a bonus, and not a focus.

When I lost all the weight the first time I was obsessively rolling out of bed every morning, every morning, to work out on the Wii Fit. Morning workouts aren't a problem per se, but I remember a conversation with a friend at one point where I told her, "God will always be there, right now I need to focus on me and my body." Um, what? Hello, danger! Danger! It wasn't very long after that that my weight loss efforts completely fell apart and I began the process of putting back on the 50+ lbs that I gained before this current effort to lose weight and get healthy in God's strength and not my own. I put those 50 lbs on in 2 years. I wonder if my friend wasn't praying for my perspective to get right. If she was, I am grateful because I know I walked right up to and contemplated walking down a very dangerous path.

In that season of my life working out became like an addiction. I remember finding myself in a hotel gym at 6 in the morning on a weekend trip with my husband because I HAD to work out, HAD TO. It was compulsive and unhealthy. I was on a marriage retreat weekend and focusing completely on me. That's a person I don't want to be.

Am I proud of this weight loss? Yes, I am. But I refuse to be PRIDEFUL IN this weight loss. I know it's not about anything other than honoring God in my body. I know it's by HIS power that I am able to have balance and make good choices, work out when I can, but never before or in lieu of spending time with the Lord. The only thing I find myself being regimented in these days is spending time with Him. I don't even roll out of bed without prayer, the Word and or journaling to Him. And every day I pray, "Lord help me lose the weight, but help me keep it in the right perspective. And NEVER let me become full of myself in the process."

I have been open and shared a lot about this weight loss/ lifestyle change process because I want to encourage others. With God's help ANYONE can do it. And if you do it with Him, it is a journey worth taking. All glory to Him!

As of Day 172 I have lost 50.9 lbs; I've lost 3" in each of my arms; 9" in my chest; 13" in my waist; 9" in my hips; and 5" in each of my thighs. That's 62 1/2% way to my weight loss goal and a total of 47 inches. That's less than 6 months, only 24 1/2 weeks, and I feel like a new person. It took two things, saying "Yes" to God and allowing Him to be Lord of my body, the food I eat, and how I care for myself, and then taking the first step with my hand in His. It's totally worth it, and again, ALL glory to Him!!!




1 comment:

JESSICA RENSHAW said...

Diana,

What you have learned about focus and balance is an inspiration to me. I want to let God apply this to out-of-control areas of my own life! Thank you.